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This is "false advertising" and it will cause you to imprison yourself in inauthenticity. "Dial" is a term I use a lot because it provides me with a good, concrete visual for thinking about mindset.Eventually you will have to show your true self, and the other person may wonder who that is. It enables me to catch myself when I’m falling down the rabbit hole of old patterns, and then I can see myself turning a dial in my head like a gear, knowing it’s going to change a pattern and raise my growth and potential.One way to get rid of your expectations on dates is to turn your dial to "Know Somebody." That’s it. This is not inauthentic, either: You're telling yourself that all you want from the date is to know another person, which is an honest and realistic desire.You want to hear someone’s story and experience the world through their eyes; and they'll get to hear your story and experience the world through yours.

Restaurants are such common date ideas that we decided to focus on non-gastronomical ideas.Note that many people present themselves in a way that gives you a picture of what something could Approach dating as your authentic, honest self, turn your dial from "Find the One" to "Know Somebody," get rid of your checklist, and focus on how someone makes you feel, and the ability they have to create a sense of space in your life.John Kim, LMFT, is a published writer, speaker, life coach, and a co-founder of SHFT.But it’s actually more important to have the right mindset than the right shoes.Even if the person you're going out with isn’t “The One," you can still have a great time and learn something about others and yourself.

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